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Family Check-up: Community, Mouth, and the Spirit Led Life - Week 1

Family Check-up: Community, Mouth, and the Spirit Led Life - Week 1

Series: Family Check-up

Key Passage: James 1:19-21

Speaker: Nate Wagner

Getting Started

  • Can you remember a time when someone was quick to listen to your opinion or point of view? How did this change the course of your conversation? 
  • Has anger recently prevented you from listening to someone during a disagreement? If yes, how?
  • Respond:  To a large extent, words possess the power to determine the direction and destination of our lives. 

Study Read James 1:19-21, James 3:2-12, Eph 4:29-32 

  • Observations, Insights, tensions, questions?
  • James says that “no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” Agree?  Disagree? 
  • Define and discuss the guardrails Paul offers us in Eph 4:29 regarding what we say.  
  • Paul says in Eph 4:30 that we grieve the Holy Spirit when we fail to limit our speech to that which builds up and benefits the hearer.  How should it impact us that God’s response to reckless speech is grief and not anger? 
  • What’s the most challenging aspect of being “quick to listen and slow to speak”? 
  • In which ways could being “quick to listen and slow to speak” help you avoid saying things you later regret?



  • Respond:  Words have power. The words spoken about you and to you have shaped the person you are today. 


  • Who has significantly impacted your life with their words?  Were the words that shaped you positive or negative? 
  • It’s easier for us to remember the harsh words of those who hurt us rather than the kind words of those who encouraged us. Why do you think this is? 
  • We’ve all had people tear us down. But who in your life has been there to build you up?  How have they done that? 
  • When has someone said something to you that was helpful, even if it didn’t feel good to hear?
  • Respond:  Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter or broken.  


  • In regards to your words, where do you have work to do? Who would benefit from your efforts?